Healing Your Heart: The First Step to a Healthier You

Understanding the Importance of Self-Care

The journey to a healthier you should begin with one critical step that many overlook: self-care. I'm not talking about signing up for a gym membership or jumping on the treadmill. Nor is this about changing your diet and eating healthier -- though both of those things are important to your overall health. Before you can work on the outside, you need to heal the inside. This involves addressing the emotional and mental aspects of your well-being. As mothers, we are often taking care of everyone else, and we tend to prioritize others' needs above our own. But remember, you cannot pour from an empty cup. Focusing on healing your heart allows you to nurture yourself so you can, in turn, take care of those around you that you love.

Letting Go of Anger and Resentment

Many of us harbor feelings of anger, pain, and resentment from past experiences. Maybe I'm being a bit bias here but as mothers, we tend to add our own heaping pile of self-inflicted pain and self-unforgiveness to the mix. We are not the best versions of ourselves when we are tired, wore out, stressed out (from work or juggling all the day-to-day things), and sleep deprived from burning the candle at both ends. When we are too tired to read our child's favorite book for the third time that night and we snap at them to "Please just give me five minutes of peace!" The immediate response is that negative voice in our head telling ourselves, "I'm a terrible Mom!" or "I'm not good enough!" or "I'm not worthy!"

I'm here to tell you, "THOSE ARE ALL LIES!" As mothers, we have such high expectations as to what it means to be a great mom. Then we beat ourselves up when we fall short of the high bar we've set. I challenge you to ask yourself... "What if your best friend or your neighbor was talking to you, and she called herself all of the things that you just said to yourself?" What would be your response to her? Maybe a better question to ask yourself is, "Would I say those things to my friend?" I'm willing to bet the answer would be a resounding, "No!"

This negative self-talk can weigh us down and keep us from living our best lives. The act of healing your heart means recognizing these feelings and making a conscious effort to let them go. Acknowledge that you are doing the best you can given your personal situation. Give yourself some grace and stop comparing your life to those you see posting on social media. Remember, people [usually] only post their highlights. It isn't often you see the lowlights. Everyone has their bad days and the key is how you allow yourself to react to them. Will you continue beating yourself up with negative, harmful self-talk? Or will you choose to forgive yourself and heal your heart?

If your mind is stuck in a constant state of negativity and harmful words, how do you expect to muster enough motivation to start exercising or eating a healthy diet? I can't ever remember a time in my life when I was feeling down that I decided, "A 30-minute run on the elliptical will cheer me up!" Maybe I'm out here on an island but when I'm feeling low, my go-to is a bag of Doritos and a tub of Lawsons chip dip! And if I'm really feeling lousy, I'll top it off with a pint of ice cream! I know I'm being a little facetious here, but I hope you get my point. If you want to be successful getting into physical shape or eating healthier, the pathway to success begins with healing your own heart.

Love Yourself to Love Others

As Jesus tells us in Matthew 22:39, we are called to love our neighbors as ourselves. Therefore, if we don't love ourselves, how are we to love others as Jesus taught us? We cannot. I realize that as a mother, you are probably thinking right now, "that sounds incredibly selfish!" Believe me, I get it. As a mom, we feel we are supposed to take care of everyone. Even when we, ourselves, are sick - we are still busy taking care of everyone else. But in reality, prioritizing your needs, and your health will allow you to care for those you love.

Let's consider for a moment what happens when you are exhausted from working a 60-hour work week, you've had four hours of sleep for the past three nights, and the last sit-down dinner you had with your family was at the local Taco Bell after your daughter's softball game last weekend. This is a surefire way to lower your immune system and set yourself up for illness. For me, it resulted in getting Shingles at the age of forty-seven! Self-care isn’t about pampering yourself; it's about giving yourself permission to prioritize your needs, forgive yourself, and show yourself some grace. When you practice self-love, you’ll find that you have so much more to give. It's all about balance—caring for your heart gives you the strength to care for your loved ones.

So, if your goal for 2025 is to get back to a healthier you -- let your first step be toward self-care. Stop telling yourself, "You're not good enough." Stop telling yourself, "You're not worthy." Start treating yourself as you treat others. Here’s to taking that first essential step towards a healthier you: invest time in healing your heart. Let go of the burdens that weigh you down and start loving yourself as Jesus loves you! When you do, you will step into the best version of yourself and set the stage for a positive impact on your loved ones' lives.

Share Your Thoughts

If this was helpful or inspired you, I would love to hear from you! Email me at heartmom@prayerfulwarrior.com or click on "Contact" from the Menu above.